Donald Trump was so impressed with the solar eclipse across America that he has instructed NASA to make it a month occurrence. ‘There’s no gravity in space’ he tweeted, ‘so how hard can it be?. A further tweet said ‘And if they could make the Sun less bright, we wouldn’t need those dumb glasses.’
Despite the earlier demand the President later tweeted that he never said any such thing. ‘Fake news! Failing #nytimes says I ordered NASA to change moon’s orbit. Real patriotic Americans know the moon and the earth orbit around me! Sad!’
An anonymous White House spokesman said ‘If he wants less bright sunshine, he shouldn’t talk through his ass so much since that’s where, according to him, the sun shines out of…’
Mick Turate/Titus/Oxbridge